1 00:02:13,701 --> 00:02:17,402 - thar she blows, you moby dicks! 2 00:02:30,751 --> 00:02:33,719 Ah, what is it now? 3 00:02:33,754 --> 00:02:35,665 You know, we're only trying to steal back 4 00:02:35,689 --> 00:02:37,823 a priceless artifact that, by the way, 5 00:02:37,858 --> 00:02:41,827 belongs in a... holy shit. 6 00:02:41,862 --> 00:02:44,463 He woke up. - What? 7 00:02:45,766 --> 00:02:46,798 Archer's awake? 8 00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:48,867 - Oh, my god. 9 00:02:48,903 --> 00:02:50,113 Oh, my god is right. 10 00:02:50,137 --> 00:02:54,806 If you thought that rocked, wait till you hear this. 11 00:03:32,213 --> 00:03:33,213 - woodhouse. 12 00:03:34,682 --> 00:03:36,048 Woodhouse. 13 00:03:38,185 --> 00:03:39,185 Woodhouse! 14 00:03:39,286 --> 00:03:40,385 Oh. 15 00:03:40,487 --> 00:03:42,521 Never mind, you're dead, 16 00:03:42,623 --> 00:03:44,506 which is just so selfish. 17 00:03:53,450 --> 00:03:55,384 God, we get it, phone. 18 00:03:55,419 --> 00:03:57,252 You ring. 19 00:03:57,288 --> 00:03:58,288 What now? 20 00:03:58,322 --> 00:04:00,789 - Sterling, I expect to see you at work today. 21 00:04:00,824 --> 00:04:03,492 - I was thinking maybe I'd just do what I did yesterday. 22 00:04:03,527 --> 00:04:05,527 You know, stare into the void. 23 00:04:05,562 --> 00:04:07,362 The void stares into me. 24 00:04:07,398 --> 00:04:08,563 Mostly void stuff. 25 00:04:08,599 --> 00:04:09,743 No more stalling! 26 00:04:09,767 --> 00:04:11,700 I didn't raise a shrinking violet 27 00:04:11,735 --> 00:04:13,468 that wilts at the slightest... 28 00:04:13,504 --> 00:04:14,736 - three-year coma, mother. 29 00:04:14,772 --> 00:04:17,706 Sure, coach, I'll rub some dirt on my nerve damage. 30 00:04:17,741 --> 00:04:21,310 - Speaking of, a new valet is coming at 9:00 31 00:04:21,345 --> 00:04:22,455 to see if he can do anything 32 00:04:22,479 --> 00:04:27,282 about that bacteria breeding facility you call a home. 33 00:04:27,318 --> 00:04:28,150 - I don't know. 34 00:04:28,185 --> 00:04:30,485 - Sterling, dear, I'm only doing this 35 00:04:30,521 --> 00:04:32,587 because you are totally incapable 36 00:04:32,623 --> 00:04:35,357 of taking care of yourself and always have been. 37 00:04:35,392 --> 00:04:36,658 - That's very sweet, mother. 38 00:04:36,694 --> 00:04:38,672 I promise I'll give him a fair shake. 39 00:04:41,532 --> 00:04:43,343 - good morning, sir. I'm your new... 40 00:04:43,367 --> 00:04:44,499 it's 9:02! 41 00:04:44,535 --> 00:04:46,535 Oh, woodhouse. 42 00:04:46,570 --> 00:04:48,548 What I wouldn't give to force-feed you 43 00:04:48,572 --> 00:04:50,572 aquarium gravel one last time. 44 00:04:50,607 --> 00:04:53,642 The turquoise, you hated that. 45 00:04:59,550 --> 00:05:00,649 All right, all right, 46 00:05:00,684 --> 00:05:04,486 let's not make a big deal out of... This. 47 00:05:05,255 --> 00:05:08,223 Thank you for so swiftly honoring my request. 48 00:05:10,394 --> 00:05:11,626 Oh, a wave, 49 00:05:11,662 --> 00:05:14,563 an entirely appropriate response to my heroism. 50 00:05:14,598 --> 00:05:16,331 - Welcome back, sir. 51 00:05:17,568 --> 00:05:18,734 - Oh, that's it? 52 00:05:18,769 --> 00:05:21,703 I was expecting some kind of batshit crazy add-on. 53 00:05:21,739 --> 00:05:23,650 - I'm sure I don't know what you mean. 54 00:05:23,674 --> 00:05:26,308 Here's your briefing book, new staff handbook, 55 00:05:26,343 --> 00:05:27,420 and your drink. 56 00:05:27,444 --> 00:05:28,444 - Thank you. 57 00:05:28,479 --> 00:05:30,512 Um, just out of curiosity, 58 00:05:30,547 --> 00:05:31,725 when did you get your shit together? 59 00:05:31,749 --> 00:05:32,859 - Oh, I don't know. 60 00:05:32,883 --> 00:05:34,761 I guess it was probably around coma-o'clock. 61 00:05:34,785 --> 00:05:35,951 - wait, what? 62 00:05:35,986 --> 00:05:38,954 - That's just an inside joke we had about your coma. 63 00:05:38,989 --> 00:05:42,457 I guess you had to be there and not in a coma. 64 00:05:42,493 --> 00:05:43,725 Well, you made it... 65 00:05:43,761 --> 00:05:45,605 Two hours late, but you're here. 66 00:05:45,629 --> 00:05:47,007 - I'm supposed to be here at a time? 67 00:05:47,031 --> 00:05:50,632 - We've got a mission tonight, and I want you on it. 68 00:05:50,667 --> 00:05:53,368 - A mission? So we're really spies again? 69 00:05:53,404 --> 00:05:54,102 - Mm-hmm. 70 00:05:54,138 --> 00:05:56,438 - A quasi-independent, freelance 71 00:05:56,473 --> 00:05:57,773 international spy organization. 72 00:05:57,808 --> 00:06:00,742 - Don't worry about it. - I kind of feel like I should. 73 00:06:00,778 --> 00:06:02,511 - Well, then still don't. 74 00:06:02,546 --> 00:06:03,845 So now that we're all here... 75 00:06:03,881 --> 00:06:05,658 - Whoa, wait. What about lana? 76 00:06:05,682 --> 00:06:08,717 - She's doing... Advance scouting. 77 00:06:08,752 --> 00:06:10,663 - Man, I've hardly seen her at all. 78 00:06:10,687 --> 00:06:12,599 It would almost seem like she's ducking me. 79 00:06:13,857 --> 00:06:16,691 - oh, stop it with the portentous mumbles. 80 00:06:16,727 --> 00:06:18,660 We had a whole talk about that. 81 00:06:18,695 --> 00:06:21,630 The point is, our cover story is that 82 00:06:21,665 --> 00:06:23,899 we're providing security at a museum gala, 83 00:06:23,934 --> 00:06:28,303 but our true mission is a bit more interesting. 84 00:06:28,338 --> 00:06:29,037 Cyril? 85 00:06:29,073 --> 00:06:30,605 - Well, our true purpose is to... 86 00:06:30,641 --> 00:06:31,918 - wait, why is cyril talking? 87 00:06:31,942 --> 00:06:34,843 Wh... what is it, best agent in the world gets to talk day 88 00:06:34,878 --> 00:06:38,313 and opposite day simultaneously? 89 00:06:38,348 --> 00:06:39,181 Uh-huh. 90 00:06:39,216 --> 00:06:40,827 - We don't do that anymore, archer. 91 00:06:41,885 --> 00:06:43,985 Jeezy petes. That keeps happening. 92 00:06:44,021 --> 00:06:46,721 The dangers of increased muscle mass, I guess. 93 00:06:46,757 --> 00:06:48,768 - Hey, steroids aren't the answer 94 00:06:48,792 --> 00:06:51,960 no matter how inadequate you feel and in fact are. 95 00:06:51,995 --> 00:06:54,930 - The only thing I'm injecting myself with is hard work, 96 00:06:54,965 --> 00:06:59,367 using the syringe of... Nope, lost it. 97 00:06:59,403 --> 00:07:00,535 Anyhoo... 98 00:07:00,571 --> 00:07:04,005 Our target is peregrine, the world's foremost art thief. 99 00:07:04,041 --> 00:07:07,909 He's going to try to steal this statue of weeping orpheus. 100 00:07:07,945 --> 00:07:10,378 We nabbed it from one of his warehouses 101 00:07:10,414 --> 00:07:11,414 to use as bait. 102 00:07:11,448 --> 00:07:12,414 Our objective: 103 00:07:12,449 --> 00:07:14,816 Apprehend peregrine and pass him to interpol. 104 00:07:14,852 --> 00:07:17,719 - Man, you guys are lost without me. 105 00:07:17,754 --> 00:07:18,932 He's gonna know that's a ruse. 106 00:07:18,956 --> 00:07:21,000 - Which is exactly why he'll come. 107 00:07:21,024 --> 00:07:23,725 Our psych profile shows a pathological need 108 00:07:23,760 --> 00:07:25,494 to demonstrate superiority. 109 00:07:25,529 --> 00:07:26,394 - Sound familiar? 110 00:07:26,430 --> 00:07:27,874 - He'll show up to try to outsmart us. 111 00:07:27,898 --> 00:07:30,732 - Nice briefing, cyril. Super concise. 112 00:07:30,767 --> 00:07:33,201 - What, you guys are friends now? 113 00:07:33,770 --> 00:07:35,704 Well, I'm spent. 114 00:07:35,739 --> 00:07:37,839 And what a better way to celebrate my return 115 00:07:37,875 --> 00:07:40,075 than me escorting all of you to chez trop cher 116 00:07:40,110 --> 00:07:42,878 where I will generously allow you to buy me brunch. 117 00:07:42,913 --> 00:07:44,057 - Oh, no thank you. - Brunch... 118 00:07:44,081 --> 00:07:45,892 - Can you guys take it somewhere else? 119 00:07:45,916 --> 00:07:48,550 New, better cheryl is trying to get work done. 120 00:07:48,585 --> 00:07:49,784 - You used to be fun. 121 00:07:49,820 --> 00:07:51,164 - Yeah, well, your legs used to work. 122 00:07:51,188 --> 00:07:53,788 - Look, we've been targeting peregrine for months. 123 00:07:53,824 --> 00:07:55,135 This is kind of a huge deal for us. 124 00:07:55,159 --> 00:07:57,893 - So huge deal like your buddy just got out of a coma, 125 00:07:57,928 --> 00:07:59,928 or huge deal like art theft, 126 00:07:59,963 --> 00:08:02,597 which is basically a victimless crime? 127 00:08:02,633 --> 00:08:03,643 - Um... - We've, uh... 128 00:08:03,667 --> 00:08:04,833 We've got stuff to do. 129 00:08:04,868 --> 00:08:06,679 - Come on, man, we'll hang out soon. 130 00:08:06,703 --> 00:08:07,981 I swear, but until then, 131 00:08:08,005 --> 00:08:10,939 maybe chill your balls out just a skosh. 132 00:08:10,974 --> 00:08:12,974 - Oh, my balls are frosty, okay? 133 00:08:13,010 --> 00:08:15,844 But if you're all too busy and/or stupid 134 00:08:15,879 --> 00:08:18,580 to go with me to brunch, I'll be in my office 135 00:08:18,615 --> 00:08:19,915 when you're ready to apologize. 136 00:08:19,950 --> 00:08:22,050 - Not sure if this takes the sting out of it, 137 00:08:22,085 --> 00:08:24,953 but you don't actually have an office anymore. 138 00:08:24,988 --> 00:08:27,889 - Oh, so I'm supposed to hang out where? 139 00:08:27,925 --> 00:08:31,893 In the break room, alone, like a pervert, 140 00:08:31,929 --> 00:08:35,697 wallowing in a miasma of microwaved fish curry 141 00:08:35,732 --> 00:08:37,032 and its subsequent farts. 142 00:08:37,067 --> 00:08:38,912 - Sometimes you buy too much salmon. 143 00:08:38,936 --> 00:08:41,636 - What, to attract bears? Did you get that? 144 00:08:41,672 --> 00:08:42,637 There's a double meaning. 145 00:08:42,673 --> 00:08:43,816 - Yeah, subtle. 146 00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:46,675 Anyway, since my time here on earth is finite, 147 00:08:46,710 --> 00:08:47,820 krieger wants to see you. 148 00:08:47,844 --> 00:08:49,155 - Great, the only person with time to hang out 149 00:08:49,179 --> 00:08:51,913 is wanted for ethical violations in nine countries. 150 00:08:51,949 --> 00:08:53,793 It's up to ten now. 151 00:08:53,817 --> 00:08:55,784 Well, speaking of crimes against humanity, 152 00:08:55,819 --> 00:08:56,996 how do you fit anything in the fridge 153 00:08:57,020 --> 00:08:59,054 with all of cyril's proteins anyway? 154 00:08:59,089 --> 00:09:02,490 It's like the last helicopter out of saigon in there, 155 00:09:02,526 --> 00:09:03,806 but shakes. 156 00:09:09,466 --> 00:09:10,165 So... 157 00:09:10,200 --> 00:09:11,800 - The recently de-comafied brain 158 00:09:11,835 --> 00:09:13,112 is a complete mystery to science, 159 00:09:13,136 --> 00:09:16,538 like dark matter or why squirrels get so enraged 160 00:09:16,573 --> 00:09:17,439 when they see me naked. 161 00:09:17,474 --> 00:09:19,786 - Uh-huh, nodding, no need to explore. 162 00:09:19,810 --> 00:09:21,810 - So what I want you to do 163 00:09:21,845 --> 00:09:23,912 is remember all of your coma dreams. 164 00:09:23,947 --> 00:09:25,814 Put them in your mind. 165 00:09:25,849 --> 00:09:28,550 Now... Speak. 166 00:09:28,585 --> 00:09:29,884 - There's so much. 167 00:09:29,920 --> 00:09:32,721 First, I was a private detective, right, in a... 168 00:09:32,756 --> 00:09:33,833 yep, that's enough. 169 00:09:33,857 --> 00:09:35,168 - Really? 'cause there's kind of a lot. 170 00:09:35,192 --> 00:09:38,026 - Yep, just needed enough to calibrate your brain waves. 171 00:09:38,061 --> 00:09:40,128 Though if you're looking to plumb your psyche 172 00:09:40,163 --> 00:09:42,764 with morally questionable "flatliners" -style 173 00:09:42,799 --> 00:09:44,899 experimentation, I'm down to clown. 174 00:09:44,935 --> 00:09:47,869 - Tempting, but no, especially because for you, 175 00:09:47,904 --> 00:09:50,939 the clown in question is probably john wayne gacy. 176 00:09:50,974 --> 00:09:52,185 - exactly. 177 00:09:52,209 --> 00:09:56,578 - Yeah, I already have one of those in my hand currently. 178 00:09:56,613 --> 00:09:57,712 - Not like this. 179 00:09:57,748 --> 00:09:58,958 I used your scan to calibrate 180 00:09:58,982 --> 00:10:02,751 your new brain wave sensitive tactical mobility device, 181 00:10:02,786 --> 00:10:05,053 or for short, bwstmd. 182 00:10:05,088 --> 00:10:06,766 - Krieger, you should probably start 183 00:10:06,790 --> 00:10:07,800 working backwards on those. 184 00:10:07,824 --> 00:10:10,759 Let's just call it the tactil-cane. 185 00:10:10,794 --> 00:10:12,127 Hey, that feels pretty good. 186 00:10:12,162 --> 00:10:15,030 - It anticipates your moves and enhances them, 187 00:10:15,065 --> 00:10:16,175 working with your nervous system 188 00:10:16,199 --> 00:10:19,000 to rebalance you, plus infrared telescope, 189 00:10:19,036 --> 00:10:21,569 garrote, and a sleeping gas canister. 190 00:10:21,605 --> 00:10:22,470 - This! 191 00:10:22,506 --> 00:10:25,173 This is the moment it all turns around. 192 00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:28,810 My inevitable rise to my rightful place 193 00:10:28,845 --> 00:10:30,879 at the top of the... ugh... it... 194 00:10:32,215 --> 00:10:35,550 - oh, yeah, don't hold it like that. 195 00:10:39,506 --> 00:10:40,984 All our intelligence suggests 196 00:10:41,008 --> 00:10:43,174 that peregrine will strike tonight. 197 00:10:43,276 --> 00:10:44,287 Cyril? 198 00:10:44,311 --> 00:10:45,388 - Thank you, malory. 199 00:10:45,412 --> 00:10:47,679 Now this guy's silk and stealth on the entrance, 200 00:10:47,781 --> 00:10:49,741 bullets and balaclavas on the exit. 201 00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:52,317 He will shoot his way out if he has to. 202 00:10:52,419 --> 00:10:53,685 We have one advantage: 203 00:10:53,787 --> 00:10:56,471 He doesn't know that we know what he looks like. 204 00:10:56,506 --> 00:10:58,384 - Whoa. Sploosh, right? 205 00:10:58,408 --> 00:10:59,419 - Oh... - Yeah. 206 00:10:59,443 --> 00:11:00,709 We don't do that anymore. 207 00:11:00,744 --> 00:11:02,744 - You... you don't what, sploosh? 208 00:11:02,779 --> 00:11:04,557 You have to sploosh. 209 00:11:04,581 --> 00:11:07,349 You all sploosh. Everybody splooshes! 210 00:11:07,384 --> 00:11:08,750 - I do not sploosh. 211 00:11:08,785 --> 00:11:11,519 - Well, thank you, detective dick droop. 212 00:11:11,555 --> 00:11:13,355 Anything else you wanna ruin for us? 213 00:11:13,390 --> 00:11:14,667 - Oh, a great many things. 214 00:11:14,691 --> 00:11:17,625 - This is agent bruchstein, interpol liaison, 215 00:11:17,661 --> 00:11:19,494 just in from belgium. 216 00:11:19,529 --> 00:11:20,829 - So she's here to wander around 217 00:11:20,864 --> 00:11:22,664 and screw things up as much as possible. 218 00:11:22,699 --> 00:11:24,677 - I supplied you with the photo. 219 00:11:24,701 --> 00:11:26,401 - Well, let's just coast on that 220 00:11:26,436 --> 00:11:27,535 for the rest of your life. 221 00:11:27,571 --> 00:11:29,471 - Spread out. Eyes open. 222 00:11:29,506 --> 00:11:30,672 Krieger is on comms. 223 00:11:30,707 --> 00:11:32,552 - I thought we just needed audio. 224 00:11:32,576 --> 00:11:34,416 - Oh, yeah. 225 00:11:35,379 --> 00:11:37,612 - aww, you didn't bring the fun stuff. 226 00:11:37,647 --> 00:11:40,615 - Archer, I need you to stay here, 227 00:11:40,650 --> 00:11:41,761 close to the statue. 228 00:11:41,785 --> 00:11:43,529 You'll have the element of surprise. 229 00:11:43,553 --> 00:11:44,797 - Shut up. There's lana. 230 00:11:44,821 --> 00:11:47,956 - I suppose you'll tell me he's not usually like that. 231 00:11:47,991 --> 00:11:49,951 - He's always like that. - That's pretty much him. 232 00:11:51,628 --> 00:11:53,361 - lana. 233 00:11:53,397 --> 00:11:54,896 Hi. I... wow. 234 00:11:54,931 --> 00:11:58,867 Sorry, it's always a shock that you look like that. 235 00:11:58,902 --> 00:12:02,404 - Archer, it's, uh... it's good to have you back on mission. 236 00:12:02,439 --> 00:12:04,506 - Yes. I mean, no, not yet. 237 00:12:04,541 --> 00:12:06,708 Uh, look, I know you've been ducking me. 238 00:12:06,743 --> 00:12:08,755 So I need to tell you something now before you bail again. 239 00:12:08,779 --> 00:12:10,923 - Oh, coming in hot. 240 00:12:10,947 --> 00:12:14,416 Well, whatever this is, it's probably not a good time. 241 00:12:14,451 --> 00:12:15,628 - No, no, no, this can't wait. 242 00:12:15,652 --> 00:12:17,652 Lana, I lived several lifetimes 243 00:12:17,687 --> 00:12:18,720 while I was in that coma, 244 00:12:18,755 --> 00:12:21,356 in a bunch of different genres, I guess. 245 00:12:21,391 --> 00:12:22,524 Everything was changing. 246 00:12:22,559 --> 00:12:23,803 I couldn't get a handle on who I was 247 00:12:23,827 --> 00:12:27,929 or what it all meant, but the one constant was you. 248 00:12:27,964 --> 00:12:30,999 Needing you is apparently the deepest part of me. 249 00:12:31,034 --> 00:12:34,803 I guess I don't know what I'm proposing, except... 250 00:12:34,838 --> 00:12:36,938 Uh, if you could excuse us, buddy, 251 00:12:36,973 --> 00:12:39,541 I'm in the middle of giving a heartfelt, 252 00:12:39,576 --> 00:12:40,675 life-changing speech. 253 00:12:40,710 --> 00:12:42,510 - To my beautiful wife. 254 00:12:42,546 --> 00:12:44,824 Yes, I get it. 255 00:12:44,848 --> 00:12:47,615 Hello, sterling. I'm robert. 256 00:12:47,651 --> 00:12:50,452 - Bu... bu wha... bu wha... fa... da... 257 00:12:50,487 --> 00:12:51,152 Bald! 258 00:12:51,188 --> 00:12:52,053 - yeah, we can talk 259 00:12:52,088 --> 00:12:54,033 more about how and why I'm bald later. 260 00:12:54,057 --> 00:12:58,426 I know this is all a shock, but the feelings here are real, 261 00:12:58,462 --> 00:12:59,672 and I honor them. 262 00:12:59,696 --> 00:13:02,363 And we understand and love you. 263 00:13:03,567 --> 00:13:05,400 - You do not get to love me! 264 00:13:05,435 --> 00:13:06,768 That is a hostile act! 265 00:13:06,803 --> 00:13:08,603 What is the how of that? 266 00:13:08,638 --> 00:13:09,882 Though maybe the portentous mumbles 267 00:13:09,906 --> 00:13:11,851 should have tipped me off that something was coming. 268 00:13:11,875 --> 00:13:13,786 - Well, that is what portentous means. 269 00:13:13,810 --> 00:13:15,777 - So how long into my coma was it 270 00:13:15,812 --> 00:13:17,846 before you bravely pushed aside your grief 271 00:13:17,881 --> 00:13:21,649 and married that human catheter ad? 272 00:13:21,685 --> 00:13:23,563 - Eight months. - Eight months? 273 00:13:23,587 --> 00:13:24,619 When did you meet him? 274 00:13:24,654 --> 00:13:25,954 - Um, at your hospital. 275 00:13:25,989 --> 00:13:28,756 He was doing a fundraiser for kids with cancer. 276 00:13:28,792 --> 00:13:30,692 - Oldest trick in the book. 277 00:13:30,727 --> 00:13:32,760 - What book? - All the books, lana! 278 00:13:32,796 --> 00:13:33,973 - Okay, one, we weren't together, 279 00:13:33,997 --> 00:13:37,499 and two, there doesn't need to be a two! 280 00:13:38,668 --> 00:13:40,713 This is gonna take time, archer. 281 00:13:40,737 --> 00:13:41,814 Okay? There's a lot you missed. 282 00:13:41,838 --> 00:13:43,738 - I'm sorry. I... I get it. 283 00:13:43,773 --> 00:13:46,441 I just... I just need to know one thing. 284 00:13:47,277 --> 00:13:49,644 What does his skin feel like, papery or more mushy? 285 00:13:53,650 --> 00:13:55,817 - is it scaly like a sleestak? 286 00:13:58,688 --> 00:13:59,854 - quite a crowd here. 287 00:13:59,890 --> 00:14:01,801 - Yeah, they really packed them in, 288 00:14:01,825 --> 00:14:03,636 like protein shakes in a fridge. 289 00:14:03,660 --> 00:14:05,037 - What was that? - I was agreeing. 290 00:14:05,061 --> 00:14:06,806 - You know, if you have something to say, just... 291 00:14:06,830 --> 00:14:08,107 - you're a fridge hog! 292 00:14:08,131 --> 00:14:11,466 - See, doesn't that feel better than being passive-aggressive? 293 00:14:11,501 --> 00:14:12,333 - I... I guess. 294 00:14:12,369 --> 00:14:15,370 I... - Extremely passive-aggressive. 295 00:14:16,740 --> 00:14:19,674 - So what do you think? 296 00:14:19,709 --> 00:14:21,609 - It kind of looks like that thing 297 00:14:21,645 --> 00:14:22,855 where you've been away for a long time, 298 00:14:22,879 --> 00:14:24,979 and when you come back, no one really cares, 299 00:14:25,015 --> 00:14:27,582 and people have moved on, and you're all alone, 300 00:14:27,617 --> 00:14:29,517 and nobody understands you. 301 00:14:30,754 --> 00:14:32,720 Or maybe it's just a lady with big cans. 302 00:14:32,756 --> 00:14:35,857 - Oh, I don't know. Her cans aren't that big. 303 00:14:35,892 --> 00:14:37,069 - and now this. 304 00:14:37,093 --> 00:14:39,027 - You know, sterling, I think it's important 305 00:14:39,062 --> 00:14:42,797 to look at these cans in context of their era. 306 00:14:42,832 --> 00:14:45,700 - So what are you, some crazy rich millionaire? 307 00:14:45,735 --> 00:14:46,801 - Millionaire? 308 00:14:46,836 --> 00:14:49,571 Oh, god, no, no, no, no. 309 00:14:49,606 --> 00:14:51,039 I hit billionaire at 25. 310 00:14:51,074 --> 00:14:53,675 This is actually my wing of the museum, 311 00:14:53,710 --> 00:14:56,678 but that's not what this is about. 312 00:14:56,713 --> 00:14:57,890 - I find that hard to believe. 313 00:14:57,914 --> 00:14:59,847 - I know you don't want to hear this right now, 314 00:14:59,883 --> 00:15:03,718 but the fact that you think me and lana are impossible 315 00:15:03,753 --> 00:15:06,854 is what makes you and lana impossible. 316 00:15:06,890 --> 00:15:09,958 - Wow. - Yeah, hits pretty hard. 317 00:15:09,993 --> 00:15:13,828 - No, I... I've just never met a bald fortune cookie before. 318 00:15:13,863 --> 00:15:15,897 - Okay, I'll give you some time. 319 00:15:15,932 --> 00:15:18,499 - Who's bald! 320 00:15:18,535 --> 00:15:19,500 Whoa, oh. 321 00:15:19,536 --> 00:15:21,681 Krieger, what's going on with the tactil-cane? 322 00:15:21,705 --> 00:15:22,782 Jesus, your brain waves 323 00:15:22,806 --> 00:15:23,816 are all over the place. 324 00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:25,017 Is there a problem? - Yes. 325 00:15:25,041 --> 00:15:27,909 I was just condescended to by an elderly geek, 326 00:15:27,944 --> 00:15:30,511 and lana was apparently using my coma bed 327 00:15:30,547 --> 00:15:31,613 as a singles bar. 328 00:15:31,648 --> 00:15:33,025 Well, technically, it was the hallway 329 00:15:33,049 --> 00:15:34,716 just outside your coma bed. 330 00:15:34,751 --> 00:15:35,761 - How is that better? 331 00:15:35,785 --> 00:15:36,963 - It's ten feet more respectful? 332 00:15:36,987 --> 00:15:38,164 - Uh, new, better cheryl here. 333 00:15:38,188 --> 00:15:40,822 Look, can we all just admit that seeing someone in a coma 334 00:15:40,857 --> 00:15:43,558 is intensely erotic? 335 00:15:43,593 --> 00:15:44,559 No. 336 00:15:44,594 --> 00:15:46,995 - Man, it was so easy to remember the good stuff 337 00:15:47,030 --> 00:15:51,633 when he didn't interrupt it with his mouth and his face 338 00:15:51,668 --> 00:15:52,934 and his general being. 339 00:15:52,969 --> 00:15:56,270 - Oh, well, I'm sorry for practicing a little self-care. 340 00:15:56,306 --> 00:15:58,840 - Like the time I caught you practicing self-care 341 00:15:58,875 --> 00:15:59,875 in your office. 342 00:15:59,909 --> 00:16:01,509 - You know I wage a constant battle 343 00:16:01,544 --> 00:16:02,410 against my impulses. 344 00:16:02,445 --> 00:16:04,746 - Well, thank you, onan the barbarian. 345 00:16:04,781 --> 00:16:05,925 Yeah, you got bible burned. 346 00:16:05,949 --> 00:16:07,915 - What in god's name is going on? 347 00:16:07,951 --> 00:16:10,218 I see sloppy positioning, uncovered zones, 348 00:16:10,253 --> 00:16:13,221 and that dress isn't doing your hips any favors, lana. 349 00:16:13,256 --> 00:16:15,890 - Well, at least my hips didn't produce a human disruption 350 00:16:15,925 --> 00:16:17,003 on the scale of an ice age. 351 00:16:17,027 --> 00:16:18,793 Whoa, wait a second. 352 00:16:18,828 --> 00:16:21,729 I've had my shakes in the fridge for months. 353 00:16:21,765 --> 00:16:22,875 Why did you suddenly get annoyed? 354 00:16:22,899 --> 00:16:24,710 - Dukes! Archer just made 355 00:16:24,734 --> 00:16:25,978 some little comment about it. 356 00:16:26,002 --> 00:16:28,836 It's like he doesn't even have to try to cause problems. 357 00:16:28,872 --> 00:16:30,850 - Look, we had a great team dynamic going 358 00:16:30,874 --> 00:16:31,914 before he came back. 359 00:16:31,941 --> 00:16:32,952 So let's just roll it back 360 00:16:32,976 --> 00:16:35,610 to coma-o'clock and... oh, my god. 361 00:16:35,645 --> 00:16:36,678 - Wait. 362 00:16:36,713 --> 00:16:38,713 Was everyone really happier 363 00:16:38,748 --> 00:16:39,814 without me? 364 00:16:39,849 --> 00:16:41,060 - No. - Is anybody really happy? 365 00:16:41,084 --> 00:16:43,885 - No, it's not that we were happier without you. 366 00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:45,798 It's just that we became happier 367 00:16:45,822 --> 00:16:47,733 when you weren't arou... Oh, crap. 368 00:16:47,757 --> 00:16:48,868 That's the same thing. 369 00:16:54,931 --> 00:16:56,898 - I would like four of your most 370 00:16:56,933 --> 00:16:58,900 stupidly expensive whiskeys. 371 00:16:58,935 --> 00:16:59,867 Sorry, sir, 372 00:16:59,903 --> 00:17:00,868 one drink per patron, 373 00:17:00,904 --> 00:17:02,014 and we only have beer and wine. 374 00:17:02,038 --> 00:17:04,038 - Beer and wine? What am I, 12? 375 00:17:04,074 --> 00:17:06,052 - I'll deal with you when you become more sensible. 376 00:17:06,076 --> 00:17:08,776 - That'll be never, pal. - Next. 377 00:17:10,146 --> 00:17:12,880 Oh, woodhouse, what happened to us? 378 00:17:12,916 --> 00:17:15,817 - Oh, shit. You're talking to rocks now? 379 00:17:15,852 --> 00:17:17,063 - No, no, silly. 380 00:17:17,087 --> 00:17:19,647 Just... I was just looking for a real drink. 381 00:17:20,790 --> 00:17:22,890 You shining liquor angel. 382 00:17:24,027 --> 00:17:26,828 - see? Told you we'd catch up later. 383 00:17:26,863 --> 00:17:28,930 I missed the shit out of you. 384 00:17:28,965 --> 00:17:30,810 - Yeah, well, that makes exactly one of you. 385 00:17:30,834 --> 00:17:31,977 What is with everybody? 386 00:17:32,001 --> 00:17:34,202 - It's been three years, numb nuts. 387 00:17:34,237 --> 00:17:36,938 We've had a whole thing going without you. 388 00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:40,007 Can't you just make an effort to fit yourself in? 389 00:17:40,043 --> 00:17:41,909 - Boom, phrasing, 390 00:17:41,945 --> 00:17:43,956 which we probably don't even say anymore. 391 00:17:43,980 --> 00:17:45,913 Look, I... I'll try and fit in, 392 00:17:45,949 --> 00:17:47,993 but what's with lana and methuselah? 393 00:17:48,017 --> 00:17:49,295 I've never seen her happier, 394 00:17:49,319 --> 00:17:52,954 and honestly, you two have a lot in common. 395 00:17:52,989 --> 00:17:55,000 - How do you figure? - Well, now you both have 396 00:17:55,024 --> 00:17:57,825 a lifelong relationship with a "kane." 397 00:17:57,861 --> 00:17:59,105 ah-cha-cha! - Oh, right. 398 00:17:59,129 --> 00:18:01,107 Lana ka... yeah. Okay, that's pretty solid. 399 00:18:01,131 --> 00:18:04,365 - Well, look who stopped being such a bitch. 400 00:18:08,938 --> 00:18:10,049 - all right, everyone. 401 00:18:10,073 --> 00:18:12,151 I'm sorry I've been a distraction, 402 00:18:12,175 --> 00:18:14,242 and while it pains me to say it, 403 00:18:14,277 --> 00:18:17,779 I will cede ground to you guys... for now... 404 00:18:17,814 --> 00:18:20,948 And I will accept a... 405 00:18:20,984 --> 00:18:23,985 I will accept a... 406 00:18:24,020 --> 00:18:25,119 Support role. 407 00:18:25,155 --> 00:18:27,922 - You know, archer, like orpheus, 408 00:18:27,957 --> 00:18:30,291 you too have visited the land of the dead. 409 00:18:30,326 --> 00:18:33,161 - Jesus, cyril, if I needed someone to murder subtext, 410 00:18:33,196 --> 00:18:35,997 I'd dig up ayn rand and stick a pen in her hand. 411 00:18:36,032 --> 00:18:38,833 - Well, this is all quite inspiring, 412 00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:40,935 but it might have been more useful 413 00:18:40,970 --> 00:18:45,406 if the statue weren't already gone! 414 00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:51,796 - Yes, keep staring. It might reappear. 415 00:18:51,898 --> 00:18:53,931 Seal off the exits! Find him! 416 00:18:54,033 --> 00:18:57,768 - And, uh, I support you enthusiastically, 417 00:18:57,871 --> 00:18:59,637 for... for that is who I am. 418 00:18:59,739 --> 00:19:00,983 - Ugh, the incompetence! 419 00:19:01,007 --> 00:19:03,018 - I can assure you, agent bruchstein, 420 00:19:03,042 --> 00:19:05,776 nothing like this has ever happened before. 421 00:19:05,879 --> 00:19:07,159 - Or will again. 422 00:19:07,213 --> 00:19:10,264 Interpol had its doubts, and I spoke up for you! 423 00:19:10,300 --> 00:19:13,134 - Well, if you can get fired over this, 424 00:19:13,169 --> 00:19:14,847 I'm sure we can... - 425 00:19:14,871 --> 00:19:16,304 fired? Oh, no, no, no. 426 00:19:16,339 --> 00:19:20,074 Europe's labor laws are much too strong for that. 427 00:19:20,109 --> 00:19:22,910 - Reprimanded? - Not with my union. 428 00:19:22,946 --> 00:19:25,446 I have to check in with headquarters. 429 00:19:26,015 --> 00:19:27,126 - Huh. 430 00:19:27,150 --> 00:19:29,717 And I thought we beat the communists. 431 00:19:29,752 --> 00:19:31,652 I need a drink. 432 00:19:33,189 --> 00:19:35,301 - Krieger, you've been monitoring my brain waves 433 00:19:35,325 --> 00:19:37,236 and location through the tactil-cane, right? 434 00:19:37,260 --> 00:19:38,593 - Yes, but not in a creepy way. 435 00:19:38,628 --> 00:19:41,929 Everything you do is by definition in a creepy way. 436 00:19:41,965 --> 00:19:44,043 - Hey, uncalled for! Also fair. 437 00:19:44,067 --> 00:19:45,978 - If I look at that photo now, can you check 438 00:19:46,002 --> 00:19:47,980 if there were any places I saw peregrine, 439 00:19:48,004 --> 00:19:50,104 even if I didn't consciously register it? 440 00:19:50,139 --> 00:19:51,884 - Scanning for similar optic patterns. 441 00:19:52,976 --> 00:19:54,086 You saw him 16 times. 442 00:19:54,110 --> 00:19:55,387 Huh. 443 00:19:55,411 --> 00:19:57,912 You never actually saw him anywhere near the statue. 444 00:19:57,947 --> 00:19:59,225 - So that would only make sense 445 00:19:59,249 --> 00:20:01,782 if that's not the right photo. 446 00:20:02,852 --> 00:20:05,052 - And after a double knee replacement, 447 00:20:05,088 --> 00:20:06,899 I finally got back to the squash cour... 448 00:20:08,091 --> 00:20:09,301 We got him! 449 00:20:09,325 --> 00:20:12,126 - uh, honey, bit of bad news here. 450 00:20:12,161 --> 00:20:15,062 That's actually the museum director. 451 00:20:15,098 --> 00:20:17,565 I'm quite well-known. 452 00:20:19,402 --> 00:20:21,247 Nighty-night, peregrine. 453 00:20:21,271 --> 00:20:22,381 - No, stop it! 454 00:20:22,405 --> 00:20:24,316 - huh, really wish I hadn't wasted 455 00:20:24,340 --> 00:20:26,118 that sleeping gas on myself now. 456 00:20:26,142 --> 00:20:27,152 Ow! 457 00:20:31,014 --> 00:20:32,458 Krieger, bruchstein is peregrine, 458 00:20:32,482 --> 00:20:34,360 in pursuit down the south corridor. 459 00:20:34,384 --> 00:20:37,251 And great thinking putting only one gas charge 460 00:20:37,287 --> 00:20:38,386 in the tactil-cane. 461 00:20:38,421 --> 00:20:40,065 - Well, I didn't know you were gonna 462 00:20:40,089 --> 00:20:41,267 shoot yourself in the face with it. 463 00:20:41,291 --> 00:20:42,957 Always assume that! 464 00:20:45,061 --> 00:20:47,161 Ah, crap, evil bartender. 465 00:20:47,196 --> 00:20:48,896 No wonder he sucked. 466 00:20:50,133 --> 00:20:51,377 - give it up, peregrine. 467 00:20:51,401 --> 00:20:53,345 - You were supposed to find the decoy earlier 468 00:20:53,369 --> 00:20:56,270 to create the diversion, but you were too incompetent 469 00:20:56,306 --> 00:20:58,306 to do even that, amateurs! 470 00:20:58,341 --> 00:21:02,243 - And that is our strength, you waffle-faced... 471 00:21:02,278 --> 00:21:04,323 Wait, you're still actually belgian, right? 472 00:21:04,347 --> 00:21:07,248 - Yes! But I was raised in the states. 473 00:21:07,283 --> 00:21:10,217 - You lambic-gargling limburger dick cheese. 474 00:21:10,253 --> 00:21:12,186 - Those are silly stereotypes. 475 00:21:12,221 --> 00:21:14,322 - So are you guys flemish or walloon? 476 00:21:14,357 --> 00:21:16,390 That would help my specificity. 477 00:21:16,426 --> 00:21:18,337 - We gotta get closer. - All right, here's what we do. 478 00:21:18,361 --> 00:21:20,394 - Archer, cyril is tactical lead. 479 00:21:20,430 --> 00:21:23,297 - I concede that a plan that comes out of your mouth 480 00:21:23,333 --> 00:21:25,299 has at least a theoretical possibility 481 00:21:25,335 --> 00:21:26,500 of not getting us killed. 482 00:21:26,536 --> 00:21:28,247 - Thanks, archer. I'm sure it took a lot 483 00:21:28,271 --> 00:21:29,904 to almost not insult me. 484 00:21:29,939 --> 00:21:30,604 - I know. 485 00:21:30,640 --> 00:21:32,318 I mean, look at you. - Great. 486 00:21:32,342 --> 00:21:35,076 Now, ray and I will flank, set up an enfilade. 487 00:21:35,111 --> 00:21:37,356 Lana and pam on a delayed spearpoint. 488 00:21:37,380 --> 00:21:39,024 Archer, you... - Don't say it. 489 00:21:39,048 --> 00:21:40,225 - Provide suppressing fire. 490 00:21:40,249 --> 00:21:42,083 - And there it is. 491 00:21:42,118 --> 00:21:44,318 - In three, two, one. 492 00:21:44,354 --> 00:21:47,254 - Suppressing fire! 493 00:21:47,290 --> 00:21:48,456 Wait, wait, wait. 494 00:21:48,491 --> 00:21:50,235 Why do they have gas masks? 495 00:22:03,206 --> 00:22:05,773 Go get 'em, woodhouse. 496 00:22:13,049 --> 00:22:16,250 God, that smells worse than the break room salmon! 497 00:22:19,155 --> 00:22:20,265 - cyril, grab them. 498 00:22:20,289 --> 00:22:22,134 Or are you screwing with office fridge space 499 00:22:22,158 --> 00:22:23,758 for nothing? 500 00:22:27,063 --> 00:22:30,398 - jeezy petes! 501 00:22:30,433 --> 00:22:33,200 - gravel got him. 502 00:22:33,236 --> 00:22:35,136 - Archer! 503 00:22:39,075 --> 00:22:40,541 - I wanted whiskey. 504 00:22:40,576 --> 00:22:43,411 - I literally did not have any, you asshole! 505 00:22:43,446 --> 00:22:45,479 - Then why am I still angry? 506 00:22:49,285 --> 00:22:51,185 God damn it. 507 00:22:54,290 --> 00:22:56,957 - no! 508 00:22:59,295 --> 00:23:01,295 And they say art is use... wah! 509 00:23:01,330 --> 00:23:03,164 - You did good, kid. 510 00:23:03,199 --> 00:23:04,165 Lana? 511 00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:06,167 - Wait. 512 00:23:06,202 --> 00:23:08,135 Go to her. - Uh-huh, I was. 513 00:23:08,171 --> 00:23:11,906 - No, go to her because of my nobility. 514 00:23:13,076 --> 00:23:14,286 Ugh. 515 00:23:14,310 --> 00:23:17,078 Gravity, you utter bitch. 516 00:23:17,113 --> 00:23:18,846 - Welcome back. 517 00:23:20,249 --> 00:23:21,849 Took you long enough. 518 00:23:21,873 --> 00:23:24,873